Although I am not a Christian, there is much wisdom and advice for us humans in the words of the man, Jesus—one of the mightiest revolutionaries known to humankind. Whether or not an historical Jesus existed—or was a hologram—is beside the point, for he left a roadmap, which if followed, can lead one to experiencing “Heaven on earth.” What do I mean by “Heaven on earth?” Certainly NOT an eternally blissful state of fun, joy, wealth and frolicking through the tulips. And how do I interpret “becoming as a child?”
It was not until I learned through many years of spiritual, emotional, psychological and physical struggle to release all delusion of control and to trust implicitly and totally in a Power greater than my human ego, that my life began to unfold in a more meaningful and effortless way. I am still very much on this journey of learning to surrender my human will and ego to Something or Someone I cannot see, touch, taste, smell or hear. I still struggle with this even after seventy-nine years on this journey of human life on planet earth. I believe that when one finally masters this process of both releasing fear and surrendering to an invisible, barely comprehensible but intelligent Creative Force, one then transcends the flesh and finds oneself in what we refer to as the world of Spirit. Clearly, I am not there yet. However, my foot is far enough in the door to have experienced the difference in my body, mind and life when I am mindful of the fact that I know nothing about nothing and cannot create that which is both worthwhile and lasting in joy and satisfaction by dint of my human mind and efforts alone.
So, to me, “becoming as a child” is that act of release to and trust in an almost parent-like Presence that loves, protects and creates the best possible life for me to live and world in which to live it. I.e., “Heaven on earth.” I am finding that the more I surrender and become childlike in my innocence and trust of this invisible and seemingly invincible Force, the more “Heaven-like” my life becomes. All the disparate pieces begin to fall beautifully into place. Things come together in a magical way, that I, at my most creative, could not even begin to imagine. Part of the difficulty, of course, in this process of learning to trust this Benevolent Intelligence, as a child would trust a parent, is that some of us were raised in a war zone and our parents were abusive and most untrustworthy. One must first work through a process of forgiving one’s flesh parents for they knew not what they did. Surely, they did not make a pack before your birth to do everything in their power and knowledge to destroy you as a human being. So, once one gets over that major hump and experiences the process of forgiving one’s human parents, one is then able to become once more: as a child; trusting and following the lead of this loving, mysterious and inwardly accessed Creative Force that then becomes manifest as the very essence of one’s life and being…as all that one is…says…and does…
More photographs and artwork by Toni Roberts:
We do not
In the sense of granting absolution
In any meaningful, realistic sense
Is to release
Oneself from the shackles of
That rage within the heart and mind
Is to clear oneself…
Body…Mind and Soul...
Making of oneself
A passageway for
Ever open and receptive
One’s clear and unsullied being
Into the world
My Bronx Riviera Re-Visited
Last night, sitting before my
altar…candle gazing…I became aware of the Flame’s Reflection: the little flame that “i” am.
If, indeed, it is true—as I
believe—that this human “me” this
small “i” is but a reflection of the
Great Light, the Great I AM, then
where in the purity of this Light/light
do I find the mean-spiritedness…the
smallness of self and character that
was revealed in yesterday’s blog?
What I revealed was my own shadow
self; that inner woman who has not yet embraced the Holiness of her Woman-Body;
the one who cringes at the folds above her own waist…the cellulite on her
thighs…the breasts that would hang to her waist if not haltered in the best of
bras…the one who’s words and actions are out of kilter.
I apologize to that unknown woman whose moment of meditative privacy I invaded with my camera and my scorn. I am truly sorry. Please forgive me.
Today, I honor you, Sister Crone, for the self-love and self-acceptance you represent; for your apparent knowledge that you are not your body—but a strong, bold woman of spirit comfortable in a temporary flesh suit that will be discarded upon the accomplishment of your mission here and your return to Spirit. You are a true Warrior, my sister. I aspire to reach the level of your confidence and self-assurance. You demonstrate a wholeness I’ve yet to reach.
I know that you forgive me. Thank you.
I now continue moving forward confronting the darkness that still lurks in the hidden corners of my heart; a darkness fed by fear and insecurity. And as I progress on this lifelong journey
of the spirit, walking boldly through the dark places toward the Light, the beauty of who I truly am will be reflected out into my world; healing and blessing all whom I encounter
along the way.