one woman's journey to wholeness…

Archive for the ‘dying’ Category

Some Thoughts On Old Age…Disease…And Dying…

Moon Shine

Moon Shine – Photo by Toni Roberts

 

The other day, during a telephone conversation (Yes, some of us still have telephone conversations…via landlines, no less.) an old friend of mine asked: “So what are you up to these days?” She had just finished describing her days of managing an “illness”—which she fully owned years ago—along with all the other obstacles and mundane matters of living in this world.

After listening to my list of daily activities, i.e., my daily spiritual practice; blogging, crafting one-of-a-kind necklaces; my attempts at creating a website—where I can sell these necklaces—plus my photography projects; and on and on and on. Poor thing I wanted to say to her, “No, my love. Keeping busy is what you do. I, on the other hand, am continuing to engage LIFE thus holding this body mind-soul back from that inevitable process of breaking down and withering away into dust…that process we call disease and dying…and which we anticipate happening to us when we reach what we humans call “old age.”  (And that varies with one’s mindset and lifestyle!)

But, of course, good breeding prevented me from saying any of that. Plus, I knew that I always had my Blog: https://toniroberts.wordpress.com and this Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/gaiadaughters in which to vent!

Thank you, for bearing with me. But please, think about it. How is it that some of us can move joyfully, healthily and actively into our seventies and eighties…while most others of us begin the disease and dying process, right-on-time, as if programmed to do so?

Comments are welcome!

Ah…and one more thing…before you start talking about DNA and genes…do a bit of research into the latest findings in the field of Epigenetics.

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On Death By Suicide…

river post davin 3 18 16 012

River…Post-Davin; photo by Toni Roberts; copyright 2016

the loss of my beloved grandson

who last month

at the tender age of twenty-one

exercised

free will

his by divine right

and chose to exit this world quickly…

via a bullet to the head...

Got me thinking about

death by suicide…

and how all humans leave this realm

via death by suicide

   consciously…by their own hand

or unconsciously…

blaming their leave-taking on Fate or “God…”

forgetting that we are all creatures of

free will

   and that nothing

not even death is imposed upon us by some

mysterious all-powerful Force

It is we who knowingly or unknowingly

create these painful, ghastly, unimaginable  dis-eases

that debilitate and devour our our bodies

system by system…

organ by organ…

in a slow death by suicide...

Indeed…by the use or misuse of free will…

all death is by our daily decisions and choices

although my heart breaks at the thought of the degree of unendurable psychic pain

that drove my beloved to so quickly end this earthly sojourn…

this shared here-now…

I grant him his right of

conscious exercise of 

free-will…

And I here-now bless the Essence of the boy-man I so loved

on Its continued journey

Spent All Day Photographing The River And…

river 1 16 16 068

Photo by Toni Roberts 1/16/16

   weeping...

releasing deep pain

I didn’t know remained

      within

river 1 16 16 081

Photo by Toni Roberts 1/16/16

probably brushing it aside

in prayer and meditation

   whenever it came up…

as if the release of psychic pain

   is not an ongoing job…

river 1 16 16 046

Photo by Toni Roberts 1/16/16

   and so…

I have given myself this entire week

   OFF…

Saturday to Saturday

vacation

retreat

seclusion

no business

   no telephone calls…

river 1 16 16 092

Photo by Toni Roberts 1/16/16

 

   just the

   river

   my

   tears…

and

this profound sense of

   mourning

for whom?

or what?

   can’t name it…

   only know that a part of me…

a

heavy load

I’ve carried deep within my heart

since the beginning of

   memory

   can now be released…

during this week of

vacation

retreat

   letting go...

this week of

   death…

and

    dying things

Meditation On Diseases Of Old Age…Death & Dying…

Grandmother Tree; Central Park, NYC; Photo by Toni Roberts

Grandmother Tree; Central Park, NYC; Photo by Toni Roberts

 

It occurs to me that

Death

As a human condition

   Is self-determined

That we each reach a period in Time

   Some sooner than others…

   When we cease to dream

Cease to re-imagine ourselves more wondrous…

   We cease to believe…

   For whatever reasons…

That we can manifest our deepest dreams and desires

   In this lifetime…

We cease to imagine ourselves greater

We cease creating and re-creating

Self and Life

Indeed, we surrender the belief in our ability to

So do

Via the agency of human imagination…

And thus

On some deep level of being

We surrender this

Life

Body

Mind

And gradually

   Organ by organ…

   In a process we name disease…

The body breaks down as the

Soul

Prepares to take flight

To another Time of Being

To another Here-Now

Where it continues its journey of

Evolution

to

Eternal

Lightness of

   Being…

Join me. Come out as a Daughter of Gaia!

http://www.wordpress.com/DaughtersofGaia

http://www.wordpress.com/orishatreasures

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