one woman's journey to wholeness…

Archive for the ‘death and rebirth’ Category

“Rainy Days & Sundays…”

rainy day river 001

Rainy…River…Day; Photo by Toni Roberts

 

Nothing like a rainy day to turn one’s attention inward…

I was sitting here at my window altar

Exploring

Heart

   Soul…

and

Consciousness

When I uncovered tiny pockets of

Anger

Sadness

and

Rage

   That remained

Hidden

Within the dark recesses of my being…

   Buried…

   Stinking…

SHIT

Some of it dating back to childhood

   (And we all know how long ago that was!)…

Oh, how well I know

and remember

How

Unexpressed

Anger

Sadness

and

Rage

   Can…

   Will…

Eventually manifest in the

Flesh

as

   Disease…

And so…

On this rainy day

I got busy with the necessary

   Inner Work

Scrubbing

Cleansing

Mopping up

Vacuuming

Clearing

and

Cleaning out

The tons of stinking…festering…rotting

   SHIT…

I unloaded every speck that I could find of that

Inner Garbage

So that I may walk

Free

Clear

Light

   Unburdened

By yesterday’s pain

   Into tomorrow’s sunshine

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Spent All Day Photographing The River And…

river 1 16 16 068

Photo by Toni Roberts 1/16/16

   weeping...

releasing deep pain

I didn’t know remained

      within

river 1 16 16 081

Photo by Toni Roberts 1/16/16

probably brushing it aside

in prayer and meditation

   whenever it came up…

as if the release of psychic pain

   is not an ongoing job…

river 1 16 16 046

Photo by Toni Roberts 1/16/16

   and so…

I have given myself this entire week

   OFF…

Saturday to Saturday

vacation

retreat

seclusion

no business

   no telephone calls…

river 1 16 16 092

Photo by Toni Roberts 1/16/16

 

   just the

   river

   my

   tears…

and

this profound sense of

   mourning

for whom?

or what?

   can’t name it…

   only know that a part of me…

a

heavy load

I’ve carried deep within my heart

since the beginning of

   memory

   can now be released…

during this week of

vacation

retreat

   letting go...

this week of

   death…

and

    dying things

Mother Moon…In The Fullness Of Her Lover’s Light…

Photo by Toni Roberts

Photo by Toni Roberts

Fills me with

Insight

and

New Understanding

Photo by Toni Roberts

Photo by Toni Roberts

I release to

HER

All that which lay

Festering

and

Rotting

within

Dark and hidden corners of my heart

Photo by Toni Roberts

Photo by Toni Roberts

Waiting to become tomorrow’s

   Breast

Cancer

   Recurrence...

I gratefully and gracefully

Release

and

Bury

the

Old

Dead

Self

As I prepare to be

Born

   Anew

Toni Roberts’ Artwork and Photography May Be Viewed & Purchased at:

 http://www.cafepress.com/DaughtersofGaia

http://www.cafepress.com/orishatreasures

http://www.fineartamerica.com/art/all/toni+roberts/all

http://toniroberts.imagekind.com

The Path Has Darkened Again…

Photo by Toni Roberts

Photo by Toni Roberts

But this time

   I fear not…

For I have learned:

darkness is always followed by

LIGHT

and each little death heralds a

   REBIRTH

Toni Roberts’ Artwork and Photography May Be Viewed & Purchased at:

http://www.cafepress.com/DaughtersofGaia

http://www.cafepress.com/orishatreasures

http://www.fineartamerica.com/art/all/toni+roberts/all

http://toniroberts.imagekind.com

The Fall of the God

Sketch by Toni Roberts

Sketch by Toni Roberts

Poetry and more…

by

Toni Roberts

http://www.witchesandpagans.com/sagewoman-blogs/daughtersofgaia.html

Caught In The Void…

Photo by Toni Roberts

Photo by Toni Roberts

 

Autumn

Waiting

Suspended animation

Between

Death of the

Old

And

Birth of the

New

Treading

Treading

Treading

This spinning wheel of

Decay and Renewal

How long this wait?

Suppressed impatience

Unexpressed desire

Not yet time

Fall back into the Void

Into the quiet stillness of the

Waiting

Soul

Join me. Come out as a Daughter of Gaia!

http://www.wordpress.com/DaughtersofGaia

http://www.wordpress.com/orishatreasures

The Sage…

Photo by Toni Roberts

Photo by Toni Roberts

 

When at that place in

TIME

Where

Death

and

Rebirth

Merge

The Sage ceases all outer activity

To partake of

Divine Sustenance at the

Mother’s Breast:

Source of all Being

A Sunday Full Of Being…

the sacred within the mundane...

the sacred within the mundane…

feeling blue...

feeling blue…

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Visitors?

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late fall meditation…

Sunset…

view from corner window...

view from corner window…

view two from corner window...

view two from corner window…

The Bittersweet Harvest of Fall…

autumn river

autumn river

red yellow green gold orange rust

bright glorious muted

shades of Autumn

reflections of my inner state

harvest…birth

of the last of the magic

of springtime seeds

deeply planted

in rich inner soil

tilled by hands of

love devotion patience obedience

autumn river two

autumn river two

cornucopia of golden riches

fruit of hard labor joyous pain

painful joy…

born of the bittersweet chaos of

lusty summer abundance

autumn river three

autumn river three

autumn river four

autumn river four

even as my heart embraces

the joy of late fall harvest

it begins its journey of death…

departure to the underworld…

season of trees laid bare

heavily laden with

snow that covers a

cold and barren land…

my time of stillness

of listening in the dark silence

of the Deep

to Her Whispered Plans

of coming spring

with summer riding on

its wings…

rebirth…

thus the cycle continues

in a never-ending

spiral

of

joy

pain

death

rebirth…

the bittersweet exquisiteness

of this experience called

human life on planet earth

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