one woman's journey to wholeness…

Archive for the ‘abuse’ Category

Awakening…Gratitude…

awakening…

It began with guilt. I could not summon up the energy–the will–to go out into this oppressive,  New York-in-August-heat to visit my ninety-two year old; “Alzheimer-ed” mother.

I do wish to do right by her instead of just being what she deserves–what she has sown.

Found myself forgiving her–again–for all of those things real and imagined that I’m still holding against her thus preventing the full influx of God Power.

I forgive you, mother. God forgives you. Forgive yourself and thus release your troubled soul–freeing it to journey back HOME where we shall surely meet again.

And in the next lifetime–should there be another lifetime for each or either of us–let us come together in peace, tolerance and love…

I release us both  from all that came before this awakening…

I release us to the Love of God.

celebration of gratitude…

I am so thankful that I am not the boss of this life

The I that I AM takes back control from the frightened, conditioned Ego…

This Ego that refuses to accept…to submit to Something Higher than Itself…

This Ego that has assigned Itself the role of directing  human consciousness

This Ego Who, with false Pride and Iron Hand maintains the illusion of personal control

 

Good-bye Pride…

Adios, Ego…

I bid you both adieu

As I bow down before

The Anointed One

Whom I am here to serve

As holy instrument and

Divine vehicle of Love…

An unsullied vessel through which

peace, light and healing may flow…

Blessing this life I call mine

Plus the lives of all…

In and out of the flesh

Whose energy touches mine

 

I hereby release all the deceptions, fear-based beliefs and

Conditioning of this world as I slowly and gratefully awaken to

Truth and Reality

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An Open Letter to My Frightened Inner Child

My little One…

I am so sorry

I forgot about you

Forgot that you are always with me

that you are a part of me

a self within this Self that I AM

You’ve been feeling frightened…

helpless…

I know…

hey, little girl...i'm here...

Well, no more, my love

I am here and I am strong and courageous

There are no boogeymen  who can get me

I am safe

And I am your protector

I am not your parents, no…

I am nothing like your violent, abusive, alcoholic father

who terrorized you and your brother and your mother

for all of those long, frightening years…

hey, little one...you are safe now...

I am not your abused child-mother

who had not the inner or outer resources

to protect herself…

much less her two violated children

I am strong for I have

the strength of God flowing through

the blood…sinews…soul

of this body-mind

I am courageous because I know…

from living it

that no harm comes to me

when I am consciously cocooned in

GRACE

Come, little one…

walk by my side

Place your hand in mine

and thus we walk together

you and I and  the Christ-Spirit

Who walks by my side

clasping my hand…

At times lifting me up

to carry me over danger

We now have safe passage

you and I

through this

man-created world…

Come, my love…

give me your hand

Be at peace…

I gotcha!

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